Ready, Willing and Able
Binh Thuy, Mekong Delta
R. G. Smith, 1970.95
Oil on canvasboard, 1969
88-160-FG
His Military Wife
Author Unknown
A military wife is mostly girl - though there are times when her husband is away and she is mowing the lawn, that she begins to think that she is also a “boy”. She usually comes in three sizes: petite, plump, and pregnant. During the early years of her marriage it is often hard to determine which size is her normal one.
She has babies all over the world, and she measures her time in places - as other women do in years. “It was at Bliss that we all had the mumps” - “In Germany, Joe was promoted.” At least one of her babies is born or one transfer is accomplished when she is alone - causing her to suspect a secret pact between her husband and the military, which provides for a man to be overseas or TDY at these times. A military wife is international: she may be an Iowa farm girl, a French Mademoiselle, or an ex-army nurse. When discussing their military problems, they speak the same language.
She can be a great actress. Watching her children’s heartbreak at transfer time, she gives an academy award performance; “Arizona is going to be so much fun”. “I hear they have Indian Reservations - with tarantulas - and rattlesnakes,” but her heart is breaking along with theirs and she wonders if this military life is worth the sacrifice. One day later, en route to the new assignment, and filled with a spirit of adventure, she knows it is. That is, if the baby hasn’t come down with a virus, or the twins with measles.
An ideal military wife has the patience of an angel, the flexibility of putty, the wisdom of a scholar - and the stamina of a horse. If she dislikes money, it helps. She loves to gripe (Why shouldn’t the commissary bag my groceries like the supermarket?) She lets off steam and goes back to bagging them again.
She is sentimental, carrying her memories with her in an old footlocker. She often cries at parades without knowing why. She is a dreamer - “We’ll never move again.” She is an optimist - “The next place will be better.” She is a realist - “Oh, well, as long as we’re together.” You might say she’s a bigamist, sharing her husband with a demanding other entity called “DUTY”. When duty calls, she becomes the #2 wife - and until she accepts this fact her life can be miserable.
She is many persons. She is the tired traveler coming down the gang plank with a smile on her lips, love in her eyes, and a new baby in her arms. She is the General’s wife smiling in a reception line until her cheeks ache; the foreign bride in a strange American world. She is, above all, a Woman who married a soldier who offered her the permanency of a gypsy, the miseries of loneliness, the frustration of conformity, and the security of love.
Sitting among all her packing boxes with children squabbling nearby, she is sometimes willing to chuck it all - until she hears the firm step and the cheerful voice of the “Lug” who gave her all this. And, then she is happy to be… “His Military Wife.”
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